death lesson 11

God, is disappointed, at the state of his creatures "God created man in his own image." The way they ignore him is confusing. "Yeah, that guy! who screamed what he called 'righteous Jazz' lighting hit the stage, and he was one of the few who didn't survive it (if you catch my drift.)" Then God thinking about why did he make that guy say what he said? "God is a homosexual serial killer!" that is what he said before I fried him. The guy had this whole delusional, insane act of acting passages from the newspaper Jeffery Dommer did, this was followed a faux-homosexual voice (at least what he thought of a faux-queer voice) saying "and it was a sweet snack, and a savory treat for the lord." with every incantation of a syllable the comedian would snarl his nose, tilt his head like a lion yawning and enjoy the dead zebra.
   And the guy would end his act every night with a monolog the end of which is "So then, then when you get down to it...worship is god sucking his own dick. It is bad highschool poetry as Insane serial killer fantasies being displayed as the norm. I mean he can see into the future knows everything that is going to happen, and yet here I am telling you what he is doing, and he allows it. He wants you to know you are being fucked. He wants you to know disappointment is part of the plan (from the very beginning) That you will be bullied and destroyed one step removed so that he can look you in the eye and say 'I never knew you.' That He is alpha and omega and he doesn't need your suffering, he enjoys it." the guy one hand casually holding the top of the mic stand. The other hand holds the microphone that is projecting his voice to an actively cringing crowd that legitimately feels uncomfortable. "then" he continues "the whole thing falls apart, if he can read your mind then he knows everything you felt, how an orgasm feels to you. Then he knows how it feels to your partner. He knows how you taste to them. God is sucking your dick, and he hates it! That is why sex so bad because he hates what it makes him feel. in the middle of gods heart is an erect cock and he fucking loves the taste of it! That is what I tell myself every time I make love with my husband, 'you are God and get used to it' The whole situation is insanity. we are all going to die, and it will probably be violent, and all god can say is 'hey it wasn't that bad, also, please stop having sex especially the gay kind.' I mean spending an eternity with a guy who makes Jeffery Dommer look normal...and you have to fucking worship him? Get out of here with that shit. every day of the week, get out of here with that shit." 
   Frustrated by the limitations of language. The Logos reminds itself it can wipe it all away. Then remembering that there are only so many ways to cook a steak. He thinks about which one he will remove from the branching multiverse of his consciousness. The web of reality he will unmake how every soul is a mirror that reflects a part of the grand plan and its creator. But what does God look like? To that "comedian" he was a gay Jew. But God let that monolog go on to a quiet audience of you. The Demiurge in me wrote it down allowing one more lousy joke to live in the cosmos. Just like the god of my worship, has already forgiven me for not taking her seriously.
   To the one, these words originate, she is black, and she is strong. She is more then the words can express even if every word of poetry arises with her. The demiurge at the typewriter blasphemes only to remind the world how great her forgiveness is. Saying why is it so offensive to you that under the best circumstance god is a good strong woman? And that under the worst the bible was written by the one who speaks through fire, and you worship the devil. Existence is only confusing if you see God as an angry white guy. If you let her live, she will give you life, because worship is a celebration of the holy spirit. Not the fear that the guy on the cross resents you for a favor you didn't ask for.

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