Progress is a myth when seen as a utopia.

   Two posts in one day!?! ...I know right. But in all honesty, I am up whether I do something or not. And that is the same boat we are all in. Wondering if we should pull a bed in like John Lennon or reach out and try to do more than just not cause further damage.  I am a firm believer in the idea that I would rather regret something I did than something I didn't do. It could be because my anxiety was so intense that I spent the first third of my life thinking about all the things I wish I were doing.  That I have spent the last four years pushing myself out of my comfort zone so that I may actually live.  And it has been better, regrets and all. I wish I had more talent or took better care of my physical health, rather than focusing on my mind for so long. I am content, however, feeling that one day when I die, I will be able to think to myself "this fucking sucks, but it is o.k."
     I have been chiseling away at my book for the last couple of days and hope that unlike my music I will be able to be proud of it when I abandon it for the next project. Also, I cannot recommend Grammarly enough! It does not help with structuring paragraphs that well (I can still, even with my lack of intellect see problems that I do not know how to solve.) but, on a sentence by sentence level I have seen A vast improvement over a short period of time by its simple suggestions and corrections.  I want to start taking my writing more seriously, and I think that over the next few months I will have a readable draft of Dharma-Discharge, available for any who are interested.  The story is changing mainly because the healthier my mind gets, the less I feel the interest of writing my borderline misogynist sexual fantasies.  Focusing instead, on what I have learned about psychology and my growing fascination with Zen and humanism.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

What if Oedipus was my dad? (a reframing of the past.)

Grace of God make us Holy.

The impossible task