The Sock-Monkey As Alone

 "this is the great work of a man: always to take the blame for his own sins before God and to expect temptation to his last breath." - Saint Anthony.    I can't remember her name. She was sick in a good way. "take your clothes off." I said "are your sure your ready" she said. "just take your clothes off." I said. "OK OK" she said. she sat naked on my bed looking at me like an animal that was about to be put down "now what" she said. "I am going to fuck your face." I said. she smiled and told me OK. "you want me on the bed?" "no, come over here and get on your knees." she smiled big and told me OK. This bitch knew what she was doing, she was ether given a supernatural talent or had sucked on many dicks. she kept looking with her sad eager to please eyes at me and I took her up on her offer. Grabbing her head with both hands and thrust-ed like a mechanical animal. I closed my eyes and fe...

       Their was a point in my life when I thought I was special and not in a good way. I believed I was the worst at every thing I had ever tried too do and this feeling followed me for all of my life. Then six or seven years ago I found Brad Warner's book Hardcore Zen and begin a journey that I was always on, but could not acknowledge. The thing about Brad is that he won't be bullied or take shit. You can't even guilt him into being your Zen teacher anymore then you can guilt him into being your friend...the man is tough. It is easy to take tough people as cold people, but the difference is tough people won't tolerate that shit.      Most of Brad Warner's work is autobiographical so I won't waste time on the logical details, other then the ones I can think of off the top of my head. For one he is the bass player for the hardcore band 0dfx, he has done some psychedelic rock albums and loves Japanese popular culture (at one point eve...